Day #8 26-06-2015 Anxiety, Support, Friends and more Jigsaw.

Hello beautiful people. Welcome to day 8. This post is also a day late because I have been having some really late nights. But never mind that. It is totally here now. I also want to apologize in advance for the text heavy post. So today was a complicated day for me because I had some issues with anxiety and I had to come home from work early. I wasn't sure if I wanted to broadcast this on the internet for obvious reasons but I decided that I would. If I am sharing my life on the internet I think it is important to be truthful so that people can see that life isn't perfect. But these imperfections are not what make life bad. Instead of a word today I thought I would share with you a quote I don't know who it is by so if you do you should leave me a comment so that I can credit them. "Don't worry. You are having a bad day, not a bad life." This quote resonated well with me today and I feel like it's something we should all keep in mind when we have bad days. So a little disclaimer about my post today is that I will be writing about anxiety so if you don't want to read or you think you might be upset by the topic, please don't I don't want anyone to be upset by my words. So here was my day.



It started with a 5 am alarm clock and the strong feeling that I wanted to call in sick. It wasn't because I just wanted to have a sick day so I could spend some time lounging around. It was because I had a strong feeling in my stomach that I knew was anxiousness. If you don't know what this feels like, which most people probably do, I'll let you know what it feels like for me. It feels like that moment when you are walking down the stairs in the dark and you think you have reached the floor but there's actually another step. But this feeling stretches over much longer than one moment sometimes goes on for days. It could also be compared to that moment in a scary movie when you know something horrible is about to happen and your body starts tensing and your stomach churns. Now I don't want you to worry too much. Because most of the time it is not debilitating and I can live a normal day that just has a underlying feeling of a nagging uncomfortable feeling.

Regardless of this feeling I went to work because it's important to me that I live my life as normal as humanly possible even when I have anxious feelings because I don't want it to take to control of my life. For me the more I feed into my anxiety and let it stop me from living my life the worse it gets and the more things I don't do because I am scared.

Before things get any more gloomy I just want to say that. Please understand that this is a part of my life, but it does not mean that my life is bad. Yes I did have to come home from work early, but the fact that I went is a personal achievement. Now, I am writing this post, not so I can feel sorry for myself and have a post to remind myself of how hard it gets. But I want anyone who suffers from anxiety to know that I understand it is hard and I want to let you in on the secret of how I come out from my anxious state in the hope that it will perhaps help you to think of things that you can do that will help you in your life.

So this post is now going to become the story of how I turned my day around and started to enjoy the rest of the day.

This photo was taken about 6 months ago, but I feel like it is a good
representation of how happy Nicholas makes my life, so it is for this reason
that I want to share it with you.

Towards the end of my shift when my anxiety was at it's worst for that particular day. I sent a message to Nicholas asking if he could come and get me from work because I wasn't feeling my best. So about half an hour later he was standing in front of me even though my shift still had nearly half an hour left. He talked to me and made me feel better already.
Now before I continue with my day I just want to take a moment to appreciate the effect that our loved ones have on us throughout our journey through anxiety. I have always lived by the theory that although anxiety is hard for the sufferer. It may even be harder to see the people you love suffer and not be able to do anything about it. So I want to thank Nicholas in particular for always being here for me and supporting me through my life and all of it's endeavors.

Now continuing with the rest of my day....

Nicholas and I walked home together and when we got home Yukie was here. You might remember her from some of my other posts but if you don't, all you need to know is that she is a beautiful person and she brightens my life. We started on the puzzle and she is really talented at puzzle making so we all worked together to get heaps more of the puzzle done.








Daniel made us some yummy nachos and we listened to music and I really enjoyed myself.
We also ended up watching despicable me which I hadn't seen yet. I thought it was pretty cute and funny.




After all these fun times Daniel and I walked with Yukie back to her house at Kangaroo point. It was a long walk but it was a beautiful night and Daniel took some cool shots of us.

My day ended walking back from Yukie's house with Daniel talking about life. He has been a great support to me since moving in with us at the beginning of the year and he has become a very important part of the support system within my life.

I hope that this post wasn't too gloomy for you guys and I hope that you have taken some inspiration from my life. I want to acknowledge the beautiful friends and family I have in my life that help me through the good and the bad times. They help to talk with me when I need it, but share the silence when I don't and they always help me to see the beauty that is my life. Even if I haven't mentioned you personally in my post if you are a part of my life then I am talking about you as well. Because the people in my life love me and it enables me to live a full life regardless of what issues may arise.

Now before I end this very long post I want to encourage people suffering from anxiety or any other mental illness to get help. Even if you think that it's not too bad or other people have it worse off it doesn't matter we all need people to talk to. That may be friends an family or a professional or maybe even just calling a hotline. (1800 18 7263 Beyond Blue Hotline) Please know that your options are open and that even though there are some bad things in life. Life itself is not bad. It's a good life.

I love you all very much and I wish you all happiness in your lives xx